Weekend Humor

A woman comes home and tells her husband, ''Remember those headaches I've been having all these years? Well, they're gone.'' The husband asks, ''No more headaches? What happened?"

His wife replies, ''Angie referred me to a hypnotist and he told me to stand in front of a mirror, stare at myself and repeat, ''I do not have a headache. I do not have a headache. I do not have a headache. Well, I did that and it worked! The headaches are all gone. I guess it's the power of positive suggestion."

The husband proclaims, ''Well, that is wonderful.'' His wife then says, ''You know, you haven't been exactly a ball of fire in the bedroom these last few years, why don't you go see the hypnotist and see if he can do anything for that?''

Reluctantly, the husband agrees to try it. Following his appointment, he comes home, rips off his clothes, picks up his wife, and carries her into the bedroom. He puts her on the bed and says, ''Don't move, I'll be right back.''

He goes into the bathroom and comes back a few minutes later and jumps into bed and makes passionate love to his wife like never before. His wife says, ''WOW! That was wonderful!" The husband says, ''Don't move! I will be right back." He goes back into the bathroom, comes back a few minutes later, and round two was even better than the first time. The wife sits up and her head is spinning and she proclaims, "OH, MY GOD!" Her husband says again, ''Don't move, I'll be right back."

He goes back in the bathroom but this time, his wife quietly follows him in the bathroom. She sees him standing at the mirror saying, "She's not my wife. She's not my wife. She's not my wife."

His funeral service will be held on Saturday...

(A special "shout out" to my frat brother, Warren Dorsey, for sharing that joke!)