Having Your Cake

In America, we like to have our cake and eat it too. When I was a child, I never understood what that meant. Of course, I wanted my cake... and if I had my cake, I most certainly wanted to eat it. It was my grandfather that explained to me that "once you ate your cake, you no longer have it. It's gone". I then scratched my head and said, "Oh" and I began to understand. The difference between me and grown American citizens now is that I was 5 years old, I can be forgiven. In light of the terrible state of affairs this nation is going through right now, You would think they would understand that some tough decisions had to be made and with them comes consequences.

As the young Obama administration spends trillions of dollars in its effort to turn around the nation’s economy and revive the U.S. auto industry, the American public is growing concerned about the size of the budget deficit and the government’s intervention into the private sector. Nearly 7 in 10 have serious reservations about the federal government’s ownership stake in General Motors. Almost 60% say that President Obama and Congress should worry more about keeping the deficit down, even if that means it will take longer for the economy to recover. And, fewer than half of Americans have confidence in the president’s policies to improve the economy.

Again, here we are wanting to have our cake. In this case, a thriving economy and wanting to eat it too, by not having a deficit or any government intervention. The president and his administration are in the unenviable position of being damned if they do something and damned if they don't. People are grumbling a little about the Obama administration not acting fast enough on health care. If he does, the deficit may grow even deeper and that will cause these same people to be concerned about that. Seriously, what do people want? A magic wand that will make all of the pieces fit? It just doesn't work like that.

Obama remains a popular figure in the polls... but, these numbers on the deficit and the government’s intervention seem to mark a new period for the administration, as the public moves from welcoming his inauguration and first days in office to examining his initial actions as president. Democratic pollster Peter D. Hart, who conducted this survey with (Wouldn't you know it?)Republican Bill McInturff, said that Obama is still receiving a bouquet from Americans “but there are a lot more thorns in the bouquet.”

And, looking ahead to the items Obama wants to tackle like reforming health care (as I mentioned above) and curbing greenhouse gases, Hart observes that the bar has been raised. “There is no more smooth sailing for the administration. They are going to have to navigate in pretty choppy waters.” Choppy waters the Republican opposition is more than happy to navigate him through.

McInturff agrees, although he adds that the president’s continued personal popularity gives him “the latitude to ask for major action and major change.” Independents are now split on Obama, according to the poll... 60% view Obama favorably vs. just 29% who see him in a negative light. Also, three-quarters of the public say they like him personally and that number includes 27% who don’t like his policies. But, the president’s overall approval rating is at 56%, which is down 5 percentage points from April.

The drop mainly comes from independents, who backed Obama by 60% to 31% in April but, approve of him now by a 46-44 clip. Yet, perhaps the most troubling numbers in the poll for Obama come on questions about the administration’s intervention in the private sector, especially to help save General Motors.

The public sours on GM intervention and the deficit... 46% oppose Obama’s action to provide financial aid to GM in return for a majority stock in the company. Additionally, a whopping 69% say they’re concerned “a great deal” or “quite a bit” about the government’s ownership of the automaker.

But, here again... this is a case of having your cake and wanting to eat it too. If GM goes down, jobs are lost and not just the GM jobs... but, all of the companies who service GM and depend on GM for their livelihood. I found it simply amazing that a number of so-called Pro-Business Republicans said that Obama should have let GM and the banks that asked for bailout money simply fail and collapse, and that the American people should not have had to pay their tab. Incredible. On paper somewhere, some idiot might have thought that looked good but, the human face was certainly not on that paper.

The human face of the father and mother who are out of work, whose electricity is off because they've fallen behind in their payments, whose home is about to be taken from them, and who might have had a meal yesterday but are not sure if they will eat today. The human faces of their kids who just don't understand why or how this all happened to them... whole towns and urban areas where many families are acting out this entire scenario. This is why it would have been catastrophic to allow the banks and automakers to fail. This is why there was no time to debate policy for three years and then do something half-assed. Something had to be done now!

I don't like the widening and bloated deficit anymore than the next man. I'm no fool. I know that my grandchildren's kids will probably still be paying for this mess but, it's either that or I'm out on the street now, which would do no one any good at all. I'm slicing a piece of strawberry short cake. Care to have some America?

Free-Floating Anxiety Takes The Weight

I weighed myself and I've lost 11 lbs. I stand at 6' 1+1/4" inches and 218 lbs now. Still, a heavyweight contender but, a little trimmer. I suppose I could say that free-floating anxiety and stress has done more for me than exercise and proper dieting but, that wouldn't be exactly true.

I've been eating cereal for breakfast (Wheaties, breakfast of champions. Anybody have a problem with that cereal?) with the occasional banana cut up in it. When I want to get real fly, I have strawberries and bananas cut up in my cereal. I've been skipping lunch, preferring just to walk around campus and socialize with folk I haven't seen since the seasons changed. Occasionally, I would stop by Salad Alley and have a big salad and Ice Tea but, more often than not, I would just skip lunch altogether. My big meal of the day would be dinner. Mind you, this is the only meal of the day that I didn't have to pay for. I never thought I'd see the day when I would pay to eat cereal.

In the afternoon, before I'd sit down and drop these semi-literary gems on you good people, I have taken to walking. Sometimes, I just walk, think, talk to myself (although, I don't answer myself back), look up, and I don't know where I am or how I got there. Then, I eventually make it back home and sit on my steps before I decide to come inside and start writing posts for my blogs and Facebook. The results... a loss of 11 lbs! I must admit, I feel better. There is a glide in my stride and more of a dip in my hips but, I swear it's not exercise. Besides walking, I haven't been doing any exercising... I don't even like the word.

I had a swimming instructor who I swear looked like Lee Harvey Oswald, the accused assassin of John F. Kennedy. He would always make us do stretching exercises before we got in the pool. He had a decidedly southern accent and before we got in the pool he used to say, "Awwwwl rat now gentlemens... ex er cisssssssseeeeeeeeeee!" I hated the sound of his voice when he said that... it was almost like I could hear a subliminal message beneath his voice that was really saying, "I am Satan and I'm gone drown you little colored boys once ya get in that water." I could swear that that's what I heard. His voice just gave me the creeps but, maybe that's because I was a 10 year old with an overactive imagination. Some would argue that now, I'm a middle aged man with an overactive imagination. Who me? Nah!!!!

I haven't done any real exercising and yet, I've lost 11 lbs. Maybe if I do some real exercising, I can be down to my goal of 210 lbs in no time. Who knows? Right now, I'm wearing a pair of pants that actually have some wiggle room in them and I can run through my house and play "air basketball" without getting winded the way I did about two months ago.

I'm just playing with you guys. I just recently got a report from my cardiologist, who said that my heart is in good shape and that there is no blockage of any valves. I was having chest pains a few months ago, which I now know was a slight case of acid reflux. With that news and my little pain problem solved, I've been running around like a man with a new lease on life... that's more than likely the reason for the weight loss.

So, I say that to tell you this... I'm drinking an ice tea right now and raising my glass to good health, the loss of possibly another 11 lbs, and a victory of free-floating anxiety over exercise!

The Zen Master Prevails!

Phil Jackson

As you all know by now, the Los Angeles Lakers have won their 15th NBA championship, which makes them the second winningest basketball team in the NBA. Only the Boston Celtics have more championships (17). The Chicago Bulls run a very distant third with 6 championships.

The man who steered Chicago through all six of those titles is also the man who has steered the Los Angeles Lakers to 4 of those 15 titles... Phil Jackson ! The accolades flew on Sunday. He is being called the "greatest coach in modern sports history". He is the only single coach in any pro sport who has won 10 championships but, is he really the greatest coach in modern sport history?

I don't want to hate but, I used to hear this stuff about Phil Jackson years before and I used to say that, if I had Michael Jordan, Scottie Pippen, and Dennis Rodman on my team and a nice cast of supporting players who knew their roles and played the way they did, I'd be the greatest coach in modern times too! I said the same thing about having Kobe Bryant, who is unarguably, the best player in the NBA at the moment (okay, I said "at the moment"), and Shaquille O'Neal, one of the four greatest centers of all time, on my team when Shaq was in his prime and simply a beast in the paint.

I said that, to my liking, a guy like Larry Brown was my idea of a better coach. See, Larry Brown took under-achieving teams like the Clippers, Nuggets, Cavaliers, Pacers and yes, my own Sixers and made them contenders. He got them to the playoffs and the NBA championships with maybe one truly great player (i.e. Allen Iverson) on the team. I argued that anybody can win when they have the greatest players of all time on their team but, that's not so easy when you have maybe one superstar and a group of just average players.

However, Magic Johnson said something on Sports Center last night that made me rethink everything I had said before. He talked about how Phil knew how to handle the massive egos of superstars like himself, Charles Barkley, Larry Bird, Scottie Pippen, Shaquille O'Neal and yes, even Kobe Bryant. He talked about how Scottie Pippen quit on Phil in one game and how instead of yelling and screaming like a lot of coaches would do, he put his arms around Scottie, talked to him, built up his ego that had been shattered, and got a championship-caliber player out of him.

I imagine handling a man of Michael Jordan's ego and majesty was no walk in the park either. The same thing happened a few years ago when Kobe Bryant was demanding to be traded, as well as demanding that certain teammates be traded away also that he didn't deem dedicated and competitive enough. Phil put his arms around Kobe, soothed that massive ego, told him to hold on... that he was going to get him the players he needed around him, and get him a championship. Kobe made nice, Phil and management got him a nice talented cadre of young players, and two nights ago, Phil Jackson made good on his promise to get Kobe that fourth ring.

You see, Phil's talent is in being a facilitator. I know, we all have laughed and called him "The Zen Master" coach but the truth is, Phil Jackson put his ego on the back porch. He developed Kobe Bryant and Derek Fisher into leaders, talked to each player according to their needs, and got them to contribute to their highest level. So, when Alonzo Mourning remarked that " all Phil Jackson did was show up and Kobe is really running the show", I can see how it might have appeared that way but, that was not the case. Phil was actually running the show but letting his players look like and maybe even "think" they were. The bottom line is this... the guy won a championship, again!

I gotta give Phil his props because I was actually rooting for the Orlando Magic. But, these Lakers just shut them down... they defended better and they played team ball. Kobe didn't have to work nearly as hard as Lebron did when he faced this same Magic ball club. Kobe finally learned how to trust his teammates... something that was apparent Lebron James (as much as I like the guy) hasn't learned how to do yet. He's young, he'll learn... just like Jordan learned.

In the 80's, I loved the Lakers (as long as they weren't playing the Sixers) and Magic Johnson was my favorite player. I loved "showtime". I haven't loved these Lakers. I always said that they were bullies. I rejoiced when Detroit knocked them out and I leaped for joy when the Boston Celtics (a team I never thought I'd be rooting for) sent them packing last year. Even this year, I wanted to see a Lebron-Kobe showdown more than anything. Then finally, I hoped that the Magic might shut them down the same way they ousted the Sixers, Celtics, and Cavs. It didn't happen.

I'm a basketball fan through and through so, even though my team lost, I have to appreciate the beauty of the team that did win and the man that got them there. So, for the moment, my hat is off to Phil Jackson. Job well done!

Blogger & Facebook

I have wondered for a while if I am really addicted to both Blogger and Facebook... the answer was yes. I do write for two blogs, the one you're reading and my other fiction and poetry blog, Escapades, on a daily basis. Anyone who has followed me on Facebook knows that I must have taken all of the Facebook quizzes there are (and then some) and that I hold converstaions with close to 161 people on a daily basis. Okay, maybe not all at once but, in the short time I've been on Facebook, I have reconnected with people I went to high school with, people I went to college with, people who I served in the Air Force with, and guys who are members of my fraternity. I also have a number of relatives and other people who I just knew from... well, just being me.

I have always been somewhat of an "electric personality" and a "people magnet". I'm not just saying this either. In every aspect of my life, I came to know a cross-section of people. My wife and one of my co-workers used to say, "My God, is there any place we can go where you don't know somebody?" What can I say? I've been many places and seen many faces. A social network like Facebook was tailor-made for the "social animal" that I am.

My little blog opened me up to an entire network of like-minded people who I have followed to Facebook. I have not decided if I am going to get on Twitter but, I understand that there are even more people on that social network. I've also heard that it is even more addictive that Facebook or Blogger. Do I really need that too? I've got living to do! :)

I'm a natural born writer but, I never dreamed that I would spend this much time in front of a computer. I spend an hour to an hour-and-a-half each night writing my blog posts and another hour on Facebook. I suppose I could be doing something worse but, I'm going to try something else. I'm going to spend a little time this summer reading (I've got three novels and some magazines that are awaiting my attention) and I'm going to go out a little and actually touch some real live human beings.

I think that this will improve my writing and I hope all of you who read my blogs will let me know. I may not be blogging everyday like I have been but, I'll be around enough. Most of my blogger friends have taken weeks off at a time. I won't be doing that because I love this blogging thing too much. I love Facebook too. Can Twitter be next? Lord knows, I don't need another electronic addiction.

Pathetic Face of Hate

James von Brunn

My grandmother used to say that there is no fool like an old fool. (What she actually said was, there was no fool like a damned old jackass but, you get my drift here.) Yesterday, an 88 year old James von Brunn proved to be just that... not an old fool but, what my grandmother said.



Guard Stephen T. Jones, an African American, was shot to death Wednesday by Holocaust denier James von Brunn, who left his car outside the entrance of the U.S. Holocaust Memorial Museum and walked in holding a rifle at his side, District Police Chief Cathy Lanier said at a news conference. von Brunn started shooting immediately, exchanging fire with two other guards who shot and critically injured him, Lanier said.

In his car, officers found a notebook with a handwritten note that read, "You want my weapons, this is how you'll get them. The Holocaust is a lie. Obama was created by Jews, "according to a court affidavit.

Von Brunn's .22-caliber rifle held 10 more bullets. Investigators found more in his car and at an apartment in Annapolis, MD that he shared with son and his son's fiancee. Security guards fired at von Brunn at least eight times, hitting him in the face.

The museum remained closed on Thursday and flags flew at half-staff in honor of Johns, 39, who had worked at the museum for six years. Bouquets of roses, lilies, and other flowers were left outside the museum walls. The entrance where the shooting occurred was still cordoned off by police tape.

You know...If this guy wasn't so full of hatred, vile, and so wrong-headed, I could almost feel a little sorry for him. His woman had left him... apparently, she had enough of his constant anti-Black, anti-Jewish diatribe. According to her "James could talk about little else." He had very little money, was semi-employed, down to his last few dollars and had no medical coverage. In his mind, all of the blame for this lies at the feet of those damn "Negroes and Jews",
especially the Jews.

Like a lot of these right-wing knuckle draggers, had several blogs and publications in circulation in which he spewed his hatred and vile around. I had heard that for a while, he was actually making a few dollars selling his books and periodicals at Gun shows, senior citizen centers, and swap meets.

Ahhh, but now we've got an African-American President don't we? And, everybody is saying that this is "post racial" America. What exactly does that mean? That we are free to meet and mix with like minded people that want to meet and mix? I imagine one huge interracial orgy! (I'm just kidding.) The thing about it is, people like von Brunn really believe that. They believe it and a half-dozen other half-baked conspiracy theories.

They say that this man was a near genius (he was a member of Mensa). For someone 88 years old, he was far better on the internet than a lot of people in their forties. So, why? Why is someone who obviously had a brain, so warped and so wrapped around such half-baked and hate-filled ideologies? Another unanswered question and another pathetic waste of a human life... both his and the innocent man he killed.

Memories Are Made Of This

Why do people stay in toxic relationships? Why do people continue to do the same things and play the same roles over and over and over again ad nauseum? When these toxic relationships produce the same results, why do these same people act surprised? What did they think was going to happen?

Yesterday, I had a conversation with someone that gave me the answer that I had long been seeking. I usually have this type of conversation with a woman but this time, I had it with a man. This guy that I work with was bemoaning the fact that a relationship he had with a certain woman was over.

"She really wasn't a nice person" he said. Yes, I agreed, but you knew that... she didn't try to hide who and what she was. Stevie Wonder and Ray Charles could have seen what type of woman she was before she arrived. Everybody could see this except this guy. This brings me to another point. People see not only what they want to see but, more importantly, what they "need" to see.

He went on about the number of times he paid for all of her drinks in the bar and when they went out, she never had to pay for anything. He said that every year, he bought her extravaganr and expensive birthday and Christmas gifts and he has yet to receive a card. However, he did receive a text saying "Happy Birthday"... that ought to count for something.

After he talked about the bad, he got wistful and talked about the good times... the picnics in the park, the times she gave him money to gas up his car, the times he would call her cell phone and talk to her while she was driving home from night school so she wouldn't fall asleep on the road, the many times they sat on her steps late at night and drank Hypnotiq (Arrrrgggggggghhh) and just laughed and laughed. I've drank Hypnotiq... it didn't make me laugh.

Now, you know why I prefer to have this kind of conversation with the ladies. Somehow, when they retell a story, it doesn't make me want to hurl. But, I say all that to say this... it's the memories and mostly the good ones, that make people stay. It's the good memories that occurred in the early days, when the relationship was new, that makes people believe that if they try it again or if they stick it out, those days might come back.

People change, though. Women meet a guy, see potential, and attempt to change the man. Men fall in love with a woman just the way she is at that time in her life and then get dismayed when she changes. It's a never ending cycle and after the relationship has gone full circle and both people clearly realize that they are wrong for each other, instead of calling it a day, "having one more shot for the road" (as Frank Sinatra would sing), and going on their merry way, they start all over again. They do the same things to each other too and in the end, all of the things that weren't right in the first place get magnified each time you go through the ringer with that toxic person in your life.

I can't judge the man I was talking to yesterday because I've been there before myself. It was the good memories that gave you that unreal high. You became like a junkie and eventually, when things all go bad, you're now just hanging on to something that's no longer there so that you won't get sick. It's a vicious circle. Human beings have very short memories and I've talked about this before.

In closing, I'll quote Maya Angelou... "When people tell you who they are, believe 'em!" (Thanks O.G., that is becoming my favorite quote!)

And A Credit To Your Pockets

Noticed anything different about your credit card accounts lately? Did you read the fine print? I mean REALLY read it? Chances are the interest rates have crept upward, fees have increased, or reward rates have been diluted, even if you pay your bills on time. The sneaky buzzards! And, that's why I rarely use my credit cards and pay the balances in full every month, not that it matters.

Many of these changes in account terms have already taken effect. Still others, such as the return of routine annual fees, may be on the horizon. Changes have come quickly in interest rates, fees, minimum payments, credit limits, and rewards and none of these favor us.

(These guys make Tony Soprano seem like Father Divine!)

Although the banks behind these credit cards are scooping up billions in bailout money and borrowing money from the Federal Reserve (at an interest rate of as low as 0%), they aren't passing on those savings to us. Credit card interest rates have increased for many major card consumers... even doubled or tripled for some who pay their bills on time (like me). Bank of America is raising interest rates on about 4 million customers with balances. Citigroup and Capital One have also jacked up their rates. So, the next time one of those commercials comes on your TV screen, toss your tortilla chips at the screen... just clean the salsa off first.

Reward programs (what a joke) have become... well, less rewarding. Citigroup's "Thank You" rewards program "thanked" its customers by adding a $39.00 fee for all tickets redeemed through its CitiMiles program. American Express' Delta SkyMiles "Always Double Miles" program on everyday purchases became "never double miles." It seems to me that this country's entire economic system was designed to exploit and disenfranchise poor, desperate people like myself... which is why I've always been a rebel without a pause.

What's behind the upheaval and why so many changes? Why now, especially after the federal government has pumped billions of dollars into struggling banks to help bolster lending? Glad you asked and here it is...

Banking and credit industry observers say a tsunami of financial, regulatory, and economic forces is leading issuers to drive up the cost of borrowing on credit cards. The recession, financial market turmoil, frozen credit card securities market, job losses, and growing credit card payment defaults are fueling some of the changes. (Don't they always say that?)

Credit card issuers are also gearing up for 2010, when sweeping changes in federal credit card regulations will go into effect and significantly limit how and when interest rates can be increased. Recently passed federal legislation to curb practices in the card industry will fast-track consumer protections (i.e. GREED and GOUGING).

Profitability problems: Moody's, a New York credit rating agency, used a stress analysis to evaluate the strength of the six biggest credit card issuers -- Bank of America, Chase, Citi, American Express, Capital One, and Discover. They found that maintaining profitability this year will be a struggle for some. Capital One and Citi posted losses in the first quarter and American Express eked out only a small gain. The six collectively hold 80% of the nation's nearly $1 trillion in outstanding credit card balances. Whoooeeeee!!!

So, what are you to do? Wellllllll... you can do as I do. I limit my credit card purchases to what I can pay off "in full" each month. I read the fine print in detail ever so often and, most of the time, I try to pay in cash and live within my means. If I really can't afford it, chances are I don't need it. But, that's just me.

Most Americans like to have what they want to have when they want to have it and will not be denied. This kind of thinking is why we are in the financial mess we are in today. It's time for a new kind of thinking when it comes to money. I started about ten years ago before the current crisis. I didn't even know it was coming but when it came, I was already in a new mode of thinking.

Damn it, Ronald Reagan... this is all your fault!!!

A public service announcement from the Maverick of All Bloggers!

What I've Learned

1. You can love someone very much doesn't mean that they have to love you in the same way or as much.

2. We are often too judgmental. Life is short and very little that happens is that deep. Learn to forgive.

3. We want God, who none of us has ever seen, to forgive us... and yet, we can't forgive the people we actually see everyday for some real or imagined slight.

4. When I was a child, I was fascinated by the neighborhood bar. It was this big, dark room that people sat in, drank in, and it looked mysterious and cool. My grandfather and uncles always said, "Don't worry 'bout that. You'll know what's inside when you get older." Now that I've been in a few bars, I wonder what all the fuss was about!

5. The road to redemption often seems like the longest and most narrow road one has to travel.

6. I spent the first 18 years of my life wanting to be free of my parents so I could do what I wanted to do and not have to hear their unsolicited advice. Now, I'd give anything for one or both of them to tell me what to do sometimes. Unfortunately, it's too late!

7. When I was 18 years old and about to leave for college, my grandmother told me to "never forget who you are and how you were raised." Needless to say, sometimes I did forget and everytime in my life that I did, I got an unpleasent reminder of who I was and how I was expected to comport myself.

8. My mother always told me that, "A job is just how you make your money. Never confuse it with who you are." Wisdom, I actually listened to. It has served me well and helped me to keep my balance.

9. People love us the best that they can. It's not always the best that we expect them to or rather, that we want them to.

10. We are often surrounded by people who love us... and yet, we'll stress over the one person who does not love us. Recognize the people in your life that really love and care about you. The haters aren't really that important!

Cars & Girls

I took a few days off to do something important called "living". I didn't know exactly what I was going to write about when I started writing again but, I was driving around this morning and it came to me. I didn't mention to you all that I bought a new car two weeks ago... a 2008 Nissan Maxima.

Yes, sir! I sold "Ol' Betsy" for... well, let's just say I was mildly insulted by what I was offered. I'm kidding... that car was 12 years old when I got it from it's previous owner 5 years ago but, it was in good shape. It had low mileage for a car with that kind of age and it got me where I needed to go. Within the last two years I had to run back and forth to the shop with it to get repairs for one thing after another, as will happen with old cars.

I decided to get something close to new (from this century) that I knew would have a reduced price. I figured with the 2010 models about to be released, now was as good a time as any to get an '07 or '08. Finally, I said screw an '07, I want an '08 so, that's what I got.

This post is really not about cars but, about me and something I realized about myself when I was buying the car. I have been treated really badly by a lot of people in the course of a lifetime. I haven't always spoken about it here and I may speak about it more in future posts. I've mostly shared some of the more humorous incidents in my life as opposed to the painful ones.

When I first went to the car dealer, I was basically ignored for close to a half an hour, while they sat and talked to white customers in tony slacks from J. Crew, nice crisp shirts, and cute kids looking up at their mommy and daddy and giggling. There were a couple of black couples in there too that looked like young Claire and Cliff Huxtable, who were also getting attention. I had on some white linen shorts, brown sandals, and a navy blue t-shirt that read, "America's Dream" on it. I was clean shaven, my hair was cut nice, and I made sure to use some Mint Fresh Scope before I left home. I was wearing clean underwear too!

I was ignored for 30 minutes. Finally, a black salesman asked me if he could help me. I told him that I had my eye on a 2008 Maxima and I saw one on the lot that I liked if he could find it in black instead of white.

The first thing he asked me was, "Well, sir... what kind of financing will you be using? We do have financing available here for you." I told him that financing wouldn't be necessary. Well, once I said that (and, this is no lie), it was as if an alarm went off in the place. The manager came out and told the brother that he would take care of me. He asked me if I wanted anything to drink and then, he bought me a Coke (with his own money, I kid you not) and took me out on the lot.

He showed me a number of 2008 Nissan Altimas and Sentras that were black but, I insisted on a Maxima. He showed me a white one (the one I own now), took me for a test drive, and gave me the hard sell. I was impressed with the car but, I told him that I really wanted a black one so, I would check at a few more places and if I couldn't find what I wanted, I would come back. He gave me his card, his cell phone number, a number of pamphlets, took my information, and implored me to come back.

After looking around for a few days, I did return with my wife and the title for my former car and informed him that I would take the 2008 white Maxima because it was the closest to what I wanted. Again, he bought me a Coke and some chips this time. He conversed with my wife and I for 1/2 an hour, gave us the keys to the car, and let us test drive the car ourselves, while he readied the paperwork. I was treated like... well, a human being, and I enjoyed it. I just enjoyed having the upper hand for a change.

A lot of women have equally ignored me in life until either they got to know me or someone else got to know me and started talking about me. And, just like the car dealership, when I was placed in a position of finally being noticed or seemingly having the upper hand, I enjoyed it... maybe a little too much. Unlike buying a car, when dealing with a woman, I was often too happy that I was being acknowledged or getting any attention. This caused me to read a lot more into some of the situations I was in with women than what was really there. It caused me a lot of heartbreak and a lot of hurt.

If only I had dealt with a lot of women I met the way I dealt with the car salesmen, I might have avoided a lot of heartbreak and misunderstanding. (1) I wasn't or didn't appear to be too excited to get a car. (2) I asked for what I wanted and when they didn't have it, I left(even though I knew I was coming back). I didn't show my hand too early. (3) I did ask for and got a car fax. A little investigation into a lot of the women (and people in general) that I dealt with would have saved me much trouble. (4) I allowed them to do something for me in good faith before I signed a thing. With women, I was always doing most of the giving and never receiving much on my investments.

We could argue that maybe I dealt with the car people the way I did because I was dealing with another man as opposed to dealing with a woman... but, it was all the same. I had the same feeling when I was in the showroom and I didn't get any special attention or treatment until I let them know that I wasn't their average customer and I felt the same rush and exhilaration when I was being treated kind of special. Someone buying you a Coke isn't really that special but, it was the same with the women in my life. Very few of them really did anything special for me either. Yet, the little that they did do, I thought was incredible and it actually wasn't.

The difference here and the lesson here is that I saw the game as it was developing with the car and after the elation, I got down to business and weighed all of my options. I also made them sweat a bit... something I couldn't have done before in the past.(You see where I was going with this right?) It's funny what runs through your mind on a warm morning in June when you're going for a ride in your new car, while listening to Marvin Gaye on the CD player.

Commited

Keith & Rosalyn - June 3, 1989

Above are photos of the future "Maverick of All Bloggers" on his wedding day. The significance of all of this is that today marks 20 years since these photos was taken. As I recall, it was a very, very hot and humid Saturday afternoon in South Jersey. It's hard to believe that it's been 20 years. A young lady, who I will not mention by name, poured a big glass of haterade just days before my wedding and told me that it wouldn't last and that I couldn't "commit to anything."

Well, let's see... I've been a husband for 20 years, I've been employed at the same job for 19 years, and I served my country in the United States Air Force for 22 years. I would say that is commitment enough, wouldn't you?

Now, that not-so-young lady who predicted gloom and doom for my marriage has since been married two times and divorced within 5 years after both marriages. Today, she is currently single, having just ended a 5 year long relationship in which another man was living with her. Hmmmmm... I'm not one to gloat but, uhhhh... oh hell, yes I am! Perhaps she should be looking up the word, commited! (I'm just saying.)

I'm committed for the long haul and not to mention, commited to being as thin and fit as I once was in these photos!

If It's Magic

Official Website

I was as devastated by the Cleveland Cavaliers collapse on Saturday as Lebron James was! Okay, now that I've got your attention, no I wasn't. I didn't lose a penny on this series and neither did he or anyone who actually played in it. I don't bet money on sports anymore... although, I used to many years ago. Being the honorable man that I am who always pays his debts, it left me a little light in the pockets some nights.

It is quite obvious that I'm not good at picking winners. You see, I told someone as the playoffs began that the Boston Celtics were not going to come out of the east this year. I said that with Kevin Garnett out, the Celtics were weak and Cleveland was going to expose that weakness. Chicago exposed it and nearly pulled it off. I then said that Orlando, who had just dusted off my Sixers, would surely expose it and they did.

Whether it was in the barber shop or on the corner, I predicted with some certainty again, before the first game of the Eastern Finals began, that Orlando would probably win the first game. After that, I predicted that the Cleveland Cavaliers, who had operated so far with a surgeon's efficiency and ruthlessness, would knock off the Orlando Magic, who I deemed "not quite ready for prime time."

Was that wishful thinking? I don't know but, it certainly wasn't accurate. This Orlando team, which I must admit I hadn't paid much attention to, turned out to be deep and better than anyone thought. I did some research and I found out that during the regular season, they beat Cleveland two games out of three. They also swept the Los Angelas Lakers 2-0 in their season series. Who knew? These guys are for real!

It looks like the Orlando Magic, a team I have nothing against and a team that surprised everybody, will be facing Kobe and the Lakers in a few days. I wouldn't be too quick to say that Kobe has his fourth ring in the bag. These guys just might prove anyone who thinks that way wrong.

I feel bad, though. I was really enjoying all of the commercials with Lebron James and Kobe Bryant in them. I was so looking forward to a showdown between the two best players of their generation. I'll just have to wait until the two teams meet in the regular season for that, I guess. I wonder if Dwight Howard has time to shoot a few commercials with Kobe?

Weekend Update

My wife and I had the grandkids this weekend, which was just what I needed after the tragic events in my last post. Because my granddaughter is still in the infant stage, we just kept her all day Saturday and returned her to the comforts of her parents, home, and something she sleeps in called a pack 'n' play (we just can't beat those accommodations). However, we let the little man spend the night and we had a great time with him the next day at a place here in Philly that I just recently learned about from my wife, who also just learned about it from our daughter. It is said that you can learn something new everyday and it really holds true here.

On Sunday, we took our grandson to a place called the Smith Memorial Playground & Playhouse in Fairmont Park and, much to my surprise, it has been there since the late 1800's. Now, anyone who knows me can tell you that I'm "a man about town" here in Philly and always have been. I thought that there was nothing anyone could tell me about this city where I was born and raised but, in this case, I stand corrected. Our trip there actually left me wondering why no one ever told me about the place or took me there when I was a child... not even a school trip! Our grandson had a really great time and are you ready for the best part of all? Admission was absolutely F-R-E-E (and always has been) but, donations are encouraged and accepted. That's right... we had a wonderful day out of the house and didn't spend a dime (except for the donation, of course) !

We enjoyed the time that we spent with each of the "grands" but, look foward to the day when our granddaughter is a little bigger and can participate in these escapades too. Here are some photos that we took over the weekend and you can click on them for a larger view. We hope that you had a great weekend too!

Chillin' @ home on Saturday...

Playground & playhouse on Sunday...