Friday, August 10, 2012
Weekend Humor
Sex And Good Grammar For all my grammatically correct friends.
On his birthday, a man got a gift certificate from his wife. The certificate paid for a visit to a medicine man living on a nearby reservation who was rumored to have a wonderful cure for erectile dysfunction.
After being persuaded, he drove to the reservation, handed his ticket to the medicine man, and wondered what he was in for. The old man handed a potion to him, and with a grip on his shoulder, warned, 'This is a powerful medicine. You take only a teaspoonful, and then say '1-2-3.' When you do, you will become more manly than you have ever been in your life, and you can perform as long as you want."
The man was encouraged. As he walked away, he turned and asked, "How do I stop the medicine from working?" "Your partner must say '1-2-3-4,'" he responded, "but when she does, the medicine will not work again until the next full moon."
He was very eager to see if it worked so he went home, showered, shaved,took a spoonful of the medicine, and then invited his wife to join him in the bedroom. When she came in, he took off his clothes and said, "1-2-3!" Immediately, he was the manliest of men. His wife was excited and began throwing off her clothes,and then she asked, "What was the 1-2-3 for?" And that, boys and girls, is why we should never end our sentences with a preposition, because we could end up with a dangling participle.
Have a better weekend than this couple!
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KEEPING THE FAITH: RANDOM PRAYERS "ON THE DOWNLOAD"
DEAR GOD: When unexpected trouble bursts unbidden and unwanted into my life, give me a patient heart and a sure sense of your care and love. Help me remember that even when life feels unfair, your presence still surrounds and sustains me. The knotted parts of my being are never outside the reach of your touch. Give me faith to surrender my need for fairness, knowing that even in chaos, the eye of heaven is still turned towards me. I ask this for the sake of your love. Amen.
3 comments:
LOL! That was funny!
Keith, you are crazy!
This was real cute!!
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