Friday, March 14, 2014

Weekend Humor

Things I've learned From Children-

A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. foot house 4 inches deep.

If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite.

A 3-year-olds voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant.

If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong enough to rotate a 42 po...

The glass in windows (even double pane) doesn't stop a baseball hit by a ceiling fan.


When you hear the toilet flush and the words "Uh-oh," it's already too late.

Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.

A six-year-old can start a fire with a flint rock even though a 36-year-old man says they can only do it in the movies.

Certain Legos will pass through the digestive tract of a four-year-old.

Play Dough and Microwave should never be used in the same sentence.

Super glue is forever.




No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool you still can't walk on water.

Pool filters do not like Jell-O.

VCR's do not eject PB&J sandwiches even though TV commercials show they do.

Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.

Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving.

You probably do not want to know what that odor is.


Always look in the oven before you turn it on. Plastic toys do not like ovens.

The fire department  has a 5-minute response time.

The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms dizzy.

It will however make cats dizzy.

Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.

The mind of a six-year-old is wonderful.

1 comment:

Sunflower said...

Adorable!




KEEPING THE FAITH: RANDOM PRAYERS "ON THE DOWNLOAD"

DEAR GOD: My heart is heavy with my own failures. I try to excuse them and explain to myself why they occurred, because I want to be free from the feeling that I am unworthy and incapable of being all that I can be. But I find it easier to accept your forgiveness than to forgive myself. When I try to forgive myself, it seems I only remember and re-play my failures in my mind, and a sense of hopelessness floods over me. Help me to know that my past actions are a part of my growing humanity and that even when I fail to live up to what is your will for me, every single moment can be lived anew. Remind me that refusing to forgive myself only keeps me from experiencing that newness. Assure me of the truth that by casting “my sins into the depth of the sea”, you have freed me to discard them myself and live the next moment as if it were my first, for indeed it is. I ask this for the sake of your love. Amen.









































































"Mommy, can I go to Timmy's blog and play?"



































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