Friday, June 27, 2014
Weekend Humor
A farmer ordered a high-tech milking machine. Since the equipment arrived when his wife was out of town, he decided to test it on himself first.
So, he inserted his "manhood" into the equipment, turned on the switch and everything else was automatic.
Soon, he realized that the equipment provided him with much more pleasure than his wife did. When the fun was over, though, he qu...ickly realized that he couldn't remove the instrument from his 'member'.
He read the manual but didn't find any useful information on how to disengage himself. He tried every button on the instrument, but still without success. Finally, he decided to call the supplier's
Customer Service Hot Line with his cell phone (Thank god for cell phones!).
"Hello, I just bought a milking machine from your company. It works fantastic, but how do I remove it from the cow's udder?"
"Don't worry," replied the customer service rep, "The machine will release automatically once it's collected two gallons. Have a nice day."
Everybody have a super groovy weekend!
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KEEPING THE FAITH: RANDOM PRAYERS "ON THE DOWNLOAD"
DEAR GOD: Sometimes I see my life as an unsolvable puzzle. My days move along rapidly, but the people and situations I encounter seem to make no sense. I consider and weigh carefully the decisions I think I should make, but find myself doing something completely opposite of what I thought I had decided. Then a moment of stillness comes, and I realize that all these random strands are actually part of the beautiful tapestry that is the journey of my life, and I am so grateful. Thank you, God, for leading me in paths I might never choose, and for giving the journey of my life a rich texture. Amen.
2 comments:
Ouch! LMAO!
Keith-ay, you are a trip!!! Thanks for the hoop and holler!!
Have a great weekend!!
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