Friday, February 8, 2013

Weekend Humor





A lonely woman, aged 70, decided that it was time to get married.

She put an ad in the local paper that read: HUSBAND WANTED! MUST BE IN MY AGE GROUP (70's), MUST NOT BEAT ME, MUST NOT RUN AROUND ON ME, AND MUST STILL BE GOOD IN BED! ALL APPLICANTS PLEASE APPLY IN PERSON. 


 On the second day she heard the doorbell. Much to her dismay, she opened the door to see a gray- haired gentleman with no arms or legs sitting in a wheelchair.


The old woman said, "You're not really asking me to consider you, are you? Just look at you ... you have no legs!"

The old man smiled, "Therefore I cannot run around on you!"


She snorted. "You don't have any hands either!"

Again the old man smiled, "Nor can I beat you!"




She raised an eyebrow and gazed intently. "Are you still good in bed?" With that, the old gentleman leaned back, beamed a big broad smile and said, "I rang the doorbell, didn't I?"

Enjoy your weekend everybody!

7 comments:

Toni said...

Ouuuuuuuu,LMBAO!

Angie B. said...

LMBAO! GOOD ONE!

Grover Tha Playboy said...

LOL! THAT WAS FUNNY!

Lisa said...

Too Funny!

Rich Fitzgerald said...

The ending should have read, "Well, come on in!"

Arlene said...

All right now, cousin!! That was a hoot. I'm going to tell that one this weekend. Have a great one, in the fabulous snow!!

Daij said...

FUNNY!




KEEPING THE FAITH: RANDOM PRAYERS "ON THE DOWNLOAD"

DEAR GOD: I feel so uncertain, so unsure. I want to trust that you are present, that you are acting on my behalf, and that you hear and will answer my prayers. Yet, my confidence is spent, my faith flat. You speak in my heart and tell me to seek your face, and I am longing for the sureness of your presence, the touch of your breath, the warmth of your love. In my doubt, O God, let your Spirit hover over me with the gentleness of angel’s wings, until I am opened to faith and once again recognize the pattern of your face. I ask this for the sake of your love. Amen.









































































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