A
farmer was selling his peaches door to door. He knocked on a door and a
shapely 30-something woman dressed in a very sheer negligee answered
the door. He raised his basket to show her the peaches and asked,
"Would you like to buy some peaches?"
She pulled the top of the
negligee to one side and asked," Are they as firm as this?" He nodded
his head and said, "Yes ma'am," and a little tear ran
from his eye.
Then she pulled the other side of her negligee off
asking, "Are they nice and pink like this?" The farmer said, "Yes, yes
they are," and a little tear came from the other eye.
Then she
unbuttoned the bottom of her negligee and asked, "Are they as fuzzy as
this?"
He again said, "Yes," and broke down crying.
She asked, "Why on
earth are you crying?" Wiping his eyes he replied, "The drought got my
corn, the flood got my soy beans, a tornado leveled my barn, and now I
think I'm gonna get screwed out of my peaches!"
Everybody have a super groovy weekend!
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KEEPING THE FAITH: RANDOM PRAYERS "ON THE DOWNLOAD"
DEAR GOD: You know the emptiness of my heart. Sometimes I wonder if you are there, if you hear, and if there is any hope that my situation will be different. When loneliness looms around me, when my questions are unanswered, when no one seems to care, when days and nights go on and on with no change, when I fall deeper into despair, I pray that you will let your peace fall upon me as gently as the spring rain that waters the earth. Remind me of your unconditional and eternal love for me. Assure me of your presence. Fill my heart with the hope that my life is held in your hand. Lift my pain so that joy may flow freely again through me. I ask this for the sake of your love. Amen.
4 comments:
That's funny. I love these.
BWahahahahahahahahahahaha! Good one Keith!
That was funny!
You are certifiable! LOL!
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