Friday, July 22, 2011
Weekend Humor
A lady goes to her pastor one day and tells him, ''Bishop, I have a problem."
"Oh and what is that?" He asked
"I have two female parrots, but they only know to say one thing.'' she said
''What do they say?' the pastor asked.
"They say, 'Hi, we're hookers! Do you want to have some fun?' " she said.
''What?That's obscene!' the pastor exclaimed,
Then he thought for a moment.....
''You know," he said, ''I may have a solution to your problem. I have two male talking parrots, which I have taught to pray and read the Bible... just bring your two parrots over to my house, and we'll put them in the cage with Frankie and Pete." he said.
"My parrots can teach your parrots to pray and worship, And your parrots are sure to stop saying... That phrase... In no time."
''Oh Thank you, Bishop'' the woman responded, ''This may very well be the solution.''
The next day, she brought her female parrots to the priest's house....
As he ushered her in, she saw that his two male parrots were inside their cage holding rosary beads and praying...
Impressed, she walked over and placed her parrots in with them...
After a few minutes, the female parrots cried out in unison:
"Hi, we're hookers! Do you want to have some fun?"
There was stunned silence...Shocked, One male parrot looked over at the other male parrot and says,
''Put the beads away, Frankie,Our prayers have been answered!"
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KEEPING THE FAITH: RANDOM PRAYERS "ON THE DOWNLOAD"
DEAR GOD: My heart is heavy with my own failures. I try to excuse them and explain to myself why they occurred, because I want to be free from the feeling that I am unworthy and incapable of being all that I can be. But I find it easier to accept your forgiveness than to forgive myself. When I try to forgive myself, it seems I only remember and re-play my failures in my mind, and a sense of hopelessness floods over me. Help me to know that my past actions are a part of my growing humanity and that even when I fail to live up to what is your will for me, every single moment can be lived anew. Remind me that refusing to forgive myself only keeps me from experiencing that newness. Assure me of the truth that by casting “my sins into the depth of the sea”, you have freed me to discard them myself and live the next moment as if it were my first, for indeed it is. I ask this for the sake of your love. Amen.
4 comments:
Good One Bruh! LOL!
LOL! That was too cute!
LMBAO!
This is why I love this blog...You mix seriousness with humor quite well.
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