Friday, February 4, 2011

Weekend Humor


Only in America!

Only in America...can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance...

Only in America...are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink...

Only in America...do people order 2 double cheese burgers, a large fry, and a diet coke...

Only in America...do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters...

Only in America...do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and leave useless things and junk in boxes in the garage...(I'm guilty of this one myself!)


Only in America...do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place...

Only in America...do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight...

Only in America...do we use the word "politics" to describe the process so well: "Poli" in latin meaning "many" and "tics" meaning "blood-sucking creatures"..Hmmmmmm!


Oh Well, Hope this made you chuckle.....Have a great weekend everybody!

6 comments:

James Perkins said...

Hillarious but true!

Sean said...

Oh man, these were good ones! Have a nice weekend Keith!

Toni said...

Too Cute Keith!

Angie B. said...

Funny and true! LOL!

Arlene said...

Thanks for the laughs, I love this Friday humor, but don't poke fun at ambulance drivers. Here in Philly the ONLY dependable form of protection we have is the Fire Department and their excellent record of getting to emergencies in minutes! Police service takes longer than making that pizza, but not ambulance service provided by the proud men and women of the PFD.

***Pray for my son. He takes the lieutenent's oral exam next week.

BigmacInPittsburgh said...

Thanks Keith for the much needed laugh!




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DEAR GOD: There are times when I feel completely helpless to alter the circumstances in my life. I am powerless to turn around a bad economy, or ensure a favorable report from my doctor, or guarantee my spouse will always love me, or make sure I am never in an accident. When I sense that I have no control over what is occurring in my life, my energy lags and fear and frustration begin to overwhelm me. Let your spirit of peace spill freely over me until I recover my inner calm. Help me remember that it is not control that gives me peace, but knowing that I am loved and beloved by the heart of heaven. Amen.









































































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