Sean had been drinking at his local pub all day and most of the night.
Mick, the bartender says, "You'll not be drinking anymore tonight,
Sean replies "OK Mick, I'll be on my way then."
Sean spins around on his stool and steps off. He falls flat on his face. "Sheeeet" he says and pulls himself up by the stool and dusts himself
"I'm fockin' focked," he says. He can see his house just a few doors down and crawls to the door and shimmies up the doorframe, opens the door and shimmies inside.
He takes a look up the stairs and says "No fockin' way". He crawls up the stairs to his bedroom door and says "I can make it to the bed." He takes a step into the room and falls flat on his face.He says "Fock it" and falls into bed.
The next morning, his wife, Mary, comes into the room carrying a cup of coffee and says, "Get up Sean. Did you have a bit to drink last night?
Sean says, "I did Mary. I was fockin' pissed. But how'd you know?"
"Mick called - You left your wheelchair at the pub!"she said.
Everybody Have A Great Weekend!