A man meets a gorgeous woman in a bar. They talk, they connect, and they end up leaving together. They get back to her place, and as she shows him around, he notices that her bedroom is completely packed with teddy bears.
Hundreds of small bears are on a shelf all the way along the floor, medium sized ones are on a shelf a little higher, and huge bears are on the top shelf along the wall. The man is kind of surprised by the collection, especially because it’s so extensive, but he decides not to mention this to her.
She turns to him…they kiss…then they rip each other’s clothes off and romp around the room all night. After an intense night of passion, as they are lying there together in the afterglow, the man rolls over and asks, smiling, “Well baby, how’d I do?” The woman says, “You can have any prize from the bottom shelf.”
Did you hear about the guy that was talking to his buddy, when he said, "I don't know what to get my wifey for her birthday. She has everything, and besides, she can afford to buy anything she wants. So, I'm stumped."
His buddy said, "I have an idea. Why don't you make up a certificate that says she can have two hours of great sex, any way she wants it. She'll probably be thrilled!" So the first guy went home and did just that.
The next day his friend asked him, "So, did you take my suggestion? How did it turn out?"He looked rather perplexed and said "She loved it. She jumped up, thanked me, kissed me on the mouth, and ran out the door yelling, ''I'll see you in two hours'."
Happy New Years!