Monday, June 29, 2009

Sanford & "Hon"


This was just too good for me to pass up. Now, let me get this straight... South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman, voting for Bill Clinton's impeachment when he was president. He became a darling of fiscal conservatives over his ideological opposition to federal stimulus cash. Now, Mark Sanford has taken a swan dive from the moral high ground by admitting to an extramarital affair with a woman in Argentina on Wednesday. The Republican governor makes the already-difficult end of his term-limited administration nearly untenable.

Talk about being an international player. This guy goes from a four-day hike along the Appalachian Trail to winding up in Argentina with a babe! This kinda reminds me of when I was a teenager, I would offer to take the trash out, and then disappear for a few hours. I never made it to Argentina... I didn't even make it to Camden... but, I gotta give the man his props. When he gets away, he gets AWAY!

Details of that affair were revealed by The State newspaper in South Carolina, which released email exchanges between Sanford and the woman, identified only as "Maria". (Why are all Spanish mistresses named Maria?)

According to the newspaper, Sanford's office Wednesday did not dispute the authenticity of the emails. Contacted by the AP, Sanford spokesman Joel Sawyer declined to discuss them. Yeah, I can see why he would.

Emails to Argentina

One email exchange dated July 4, 2008 that the governor is reported to have written to her stated: "You are glorious and I hope you really understand that. You do not need a therapist to help you figure your place in the world. You are special and unique and fabulous in a whole host of ways that are worth a much longer conversation. "She reportedly wrote back the same day saying, "I told you before, you brought happiness and love to my life and I will take you forever in my heart. I wasn’t aware till we met last week, the strong feelings I had for you, and believe me, I haven’t felt this since I was in my teen ages ..." And, I haven't heard or said such mush to a woman since I was a teenager. Okay, maybe in my early early twenties.

Another email, reportedly sent by Sanford on July 10, 2008, contained this exchange: "Two, mutual feelings... You have a particular grace and calm that I adore. You have a level of sophistication that so fitting with your beauty. I could digress and say that you have the ability to give magnificent gentle kisses, or that I love your tan lines, or that I love the curve of your hips, the erotic beauty of you holding yourself (or two magnificent parts of yourself) in the faded glow of the night's light — but hey, that would be going into sexual details..."

The e-mail continued... "I better stop now least this really sound like the Thornbirds — wherein I was always upset with Richard Chamberlain for not dropping his ambitions and running into Maggie’s arms. The bottom line is twofold, my heart wants me to get on a plane tonight and to be in your loving arms... "She reportedly responded, also on July 10, 2008 saying, "I don’t know how we will figure all of this out and I am not interested in knowing. I prefer to think we’ll see each other again somewhere, sometime in this life and in next. I will be missing you till then. Sending you millions of kisses that will last 'til we get in touch again. Best wishes from the deepest of my heart."

The political reality is that Sanford now faces a host of legal and ethical questions. The state's top senator questioned whether Sanford broke the law when he disappeared for several days on a trip to South America and didn't transfer power to the lieutenant governor. "I would think that if the evidence indicates that there is a willful effort to circumvent the constitution, there would be a chorus of calls for him to resign," said state Sen. Glenn McConnell, a fellow Republican. McConnell said Sanford needed to answer questions about whether taxpayer money was used but stopped short of calling for an investigation. Sanford's spokesman has said no state resources were used during the affair.

He has alienated leaders of his GOP-dominated state Legislature for years, but said recently he was finding comfort outside the Statehouse as a champion for smaller government and lower taxes. He was raising his national political profile with his outspoken fight against using federal cash for anything but paying down debt. As chairman of the Republican Governors Association, he was raising money for candidates and deflecting talk he was planning to run for president in 2012.

Yeah, he really needs to forget about 2012 or 2022 for that matter... but, then again, Americans have short memories when it comes to some people and some things. People still laugh and snicker about Bill Clinton's escapades and you can best believe if Barack Obama ever has a hint of a sex scandal, there will be howls for his resignation from this same GOP that wishes like hell this scandal would just go away!

20 comments:

SLC said...

Escapades is right.....or write. I was impressed with Sanford's romantic eloquence. Maybe he can do a guest spot on Escapades. Totally fictional post of course.

Echoing your facebook comment
Must be the alcohol.

Have a blessed week.

Beautifully.Conjured.Up said...

When I heard about this, I laughed a little to myself...Karma is something else. I wonder what his wife is doing now?

Sean said...

You're back! This was on point and funny as all get up!

Captain Jack said...

The travails of hetereosexual males.(So called Republican ones)
These are the same ones who talk so much about my guys being immoral.
Thanks for pointing this out Keith.

Toni said...

Lolololol..Welcome back Keith!
We missed you and your biting political satire!

Angie B. said...

Thought you'd be writing about Micheal today...I guess it hurts to much huh?

James Perkins said...

You're dead on it once again!

Simon Bastion said...

Senator Sanford!! Who knew he was such a romantic? lolololol!

Grover Tha Playboy said...

ROFLMBAO @ you Keith... Sanford sounds like me..an International lover...He just don't have my swagger!-lolololol.

Sunflower said...

@Captain Jack- Perhaps I see some of your point, but all types of people cheat- Gay,Straight,Liberal,
Conservative,Black,White, Purple...
Sex is one thing that has no Political or Religious preference.

Swaggie said...

Welcome Back Keith!

Jazzy said...

Roflmbao- You crazy Fam, but as usual honest and accurate!

Lisa said...

Hi Keith...I knew that this story was tailor made for you and your blog...lolololol...you didn't disapoint.

Halo said...

Karma is a mother...aint it now?

Vanessa said...

This story sounds like something that would happen on your other blog-"Escapades"....but, you can't make this stuff up..it's just too funny!

Brenda said...

This is a story of life being more bizzarre than fiction...Great post Keith!

Cheryl said...

You're at the top of your game Keith, when these crazy events occur in the news..-lolololol..I knew you wer going to tackle this as soon as I heard about it last week. So glad you did. :)

Tate2 said...

Funny Post, but accurate...welcome back!

Arlene said...

Hello Witty One, I'm pleased to be reading your commentary this morning. Hope you're back solidly on your feet so your fingers can dance on the keyboard. Love your writing!! Your points are well made and funny without being cynical. I can tell you still look for the best in humankind. Want to use my magnifying glass?? Love you cuz.

Angel said...

Now why does no one ever say stuff to me like....

You have a particular grace and calm that I adore. You have a level of sophistication that so fitting with your beauty

WOW, well at least he knew how to talk lol




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