My uncle used to talk about (what I will call) "oops" moments. These are those moments between total insanity and sober reality. Here of late, there have been plenty of these "oops" moments in the news. Micheal Jackson's doctor probably relized that, whether he administered the fatal drugs that may have caused the pop singer to go into cardiac arrest and die or not (and I'm not saying that he did or didn't), it probably wouldn't be a good idea to hang around any longer so, the good doc vanished for about 48 hours and returned with his lawyer. In that twinkling between life and death, the doc had his "oops" moment!
We had a certain governor in South Carolina that told his staffers he was going to run the Applachian trial. He got to running and running and wound up in Brazil with some woman. (He must be in great shape. I so envy him! Apparently, he has never heard Shirley Murdock's immortal classic "As We Lay".) The good times in Brazil turned into a weekend. When he woke up next to his lady love and turned on CNN that morning, he found out that there was a nationwide search for him. Well, that was his "oops" moment. Then, he caught the fastest thing smoking back to South Carolina and decided to fess up.
A few years back, a man robbed a bank here and had the misfortune of being robbed himself after he left the bank. He reported to the police that he had been robbed after he held up the bank. For a split second there, it must've dawned on him what he had just said and he probably said, "Oops". At any rate, the police and his fellow inmates are still laughing at him to this day. I know that some of the arresting officers were laughing so hard, they could hardly put the cuffs on him as they led him away. As you can imagine, he didn't find the situation humorous at all.
I watched a friend of mine meticulously plan a surprise party for another friend. They sent out "EVITES" so that people would get the message electronically and in the privacy of their home computer, laptop, or BlackBerry. This way, there would be no loose talk or chance of overheard conversation. Two days before the other friend was to have her surprise party, one of the invitees walked up to her and said... "Hey, how you doing? I heard you are having a surprise party." I turned (as did a couple of other people who knew about the party) and looked at this woman. She actually put her hand over her mouth and said, "Oops!"
A moment between total insanity (or stupidity... take your pick) and sober reality! It's happened to us all. I have one final story...
Once, I was dating a girl who lived with her male cousin. She and I were trying in vain to have a converstion on her steps one night and he kept talking about how excited he was to have this new job, how he had ironed his clothes for his first day, and everything. I was excited for him but, I had hoped he would go away. The next morning he got dressed and headed off for work with everything except his pants! I was walking to her house that morning when I saw him. I noticed him but, for some reason, I didn't say anything to him.
When I got to her house, she and her mother were running out of the house screaming.... "Oh Lawd! William done walked out the house without his pants! Did you see him?" It was one of those moments when all I did was point to the direction in which I saw him walking. It was a
warm day!
You have to imagine his cousin and Aunt running down the street with a pair of men's pants and a grown man headed to the bus stop with no pants on... just a jacket, shirt, boxer shorts, socks, and shoes. I think I had my "oops " moment and started howling with laughter. I had seen him already, walked right past him, and didn't realize it. I was slow on the uptake that morning, which isn't me. I usually pick up on the crazy stuff early. He had his "oops" moment too because he came running back and they all went into the house. I sort of knew right then that I wasn't going to be with this girl much longer... her family was obviously insane. I stood out there and laughed so hard and so long that I just didn't have the heart to even go over to her house so, I had another "oops" moment and went home.
Like I said... we all have them. Have any of you had those kind of moments? I'd love to hear about 'em. I'm having one now. I realize that I just wrote a perfectly worthless post.
We had a certain governor in South Carolina that told his staffers he was going to run the Applachian trial. He got to running and running and wound up in Brazil with some woman. (He must be in great shape. I so envy him! Apparently, he has never heard Shirley Murdock's immortal classic "As We Lay".) The good times in Brazil turned into a weekend. When he woke up next to his lady love and turned on CNN that morning, he found out that there was a nationwide search for him. Well, that was his "oops" moment. Then, he caught the fastest thing smoking back to South Carolina and decided to fess up.
A few years back, a man robbed a bank here and had the misfortune of being robbed himself after he left the bank. He reported to the police that he had been robbed after he held up the bank. For a split second there, it must've dawned on him what he had just said and he probably said, "Oops". At any rate, the police and his fellow inmates are still laughing at him to this day. I know that some of the arresting officers were laughing so hard, they could hardly put the cuffs on him as they led him away. As you can imagine, he didn't find the situation humorous at all.
I watched a friend of mine meticulously plan a surprise party for another friend. They sent out "EVITES" so that people would get the message electronically and in the privacy of their home computer, laptop, or BlackBerry. This way, there would be no loose talk or chance of overheard conversation. Two days before the other friend was to have her surprise party, one of the invitees walked up to her and said... "Hey, how you doing? I heard you are having a surprise party." I turned (as did a couple of other people who knew about the party) and looked at this woman. She actually put her hand over her mouth and said, "Oops!"
A moment between total insanity (or stupidity... take your pick) and sober reality! It's happened to us all. I have one final story...
Once, I was dating a girl who lived with her male cousin. She and I were trying in vain to have a converstion on her steps one night and he kept talking about how excited he was to have this new job, how he had ironed his clothes for his first day, and everything. I was excited for him but, I had hoped he would go away. The next morning he got dressed and headed off for work with everything except his pants! I was walking to her house that morning when I saw him. I noticed him but, for some reason, I didn't say anything to him.
When I got to her house, she and her mother were running out of the house screaming.... "Oh Lawd! William done walked out the house without his pants! Did you see him?" It was one of those moments when all I did was point to the direction in which I saw him walking. It was a
warm day!
You have to imagine his cousin and Aunt running down the street with a pair of men's pants and a grown man headed to the bus stop with no pants on... just a jacket, shirt, boxer shorts, socks, and shoes. I think I had my "oops " moment and started howling with laughter. I had seen him already, walked right past him, and didn't realize it. I was slow on the uptake that morning, which isn't me. I usually pick up on the crazy stuff early. He had his "oops" moment too because he came running back and they all went into the house. I sort of knew right then that I wasn't going to be with this girl much longer... her family was obviously insane. I stood out there and laughed so hard and so long that I just didn't have the heart to even go over to her house so, I had another "oops" moment and went home.
Like I said... we all have them. Have any of you had those kind of moments? I'd love to hear about 'em. I'm having one now. I realize that I just wrote a perfectly worthless post.
26 comments:
This post is funny and I need a laugh so it's definitely not worthless. All my stupid moments have been purged from my memory.
My wife keeps up with them for me
Have a blessed week
I had one of those moments today as a matter of fact. I was a little upset about something, and I sent an email to a friend that I really shouldn't have. It is a bit embaressing really, I should have chilled out before I hit the "send" button.
I sent another email appologizing later, but I'm not sure what the status is, I hope we are still good, I don't know what I was thinking. If I could get ahold of her I'd tell her I'll do anything to make it up to her!
@SLC: I like the idea of purging the stupid moments from the memory bank, I think I'll give it a try. {smiles}
I haven't had one of those moments directly. I did have one indirectly, tho.
A few yrs ago, wifey was planning a surprise birthday party for me. She had invited one of my HS buddies to the party. I think he forgot that it was supposed to be a "surprise party". He sent me an email one day and asked if i was ready for my party?
I asked my wife about it and she denied that there was a party. Of course, there was a party. His "oops" moment forced her to move the party from December ( the month of my bday) to the end of Nov. I was still surprised.
LOL @ dude forget his pants. He was too excited about that job.
I have alot of oops moments. Oneday after work, I was heading to my son's daycare. Got to the daycare and remember he wasn't there but in STL.
The one that stands out in my mind to this day happened to me early in my professional career.
I was standing around with a coworker and my manager. We all worked for Enterprise Rent A Car so the subject was on cars. We were talking about how people went for the luxury cars as an ego boost. Then I said, "You know what is the worst! It's those people who buy a luxury station wagon. I mean, who NEEDS a luxury station wagon. That's the dumbest car purchase ever!" Then it hit me, as my coworker and manager both looked at me with blank stares. My manager had just debuted the car he purchased for his wife earlier that week. Guess what it was.
I felt like that SW Airlines commercial - Wanna Get Away?
"Oops moments" serve many purposes, but one never really sees it until later; after the embarassment fades.
I've had a few of my own...here's one I recall vividly...I was at work and had on a wrap-around-skirt and wore a thong instead of regular panties...I was walking outside and a good gust of wind caught the front flap of the skirt and sent the entire thing upward; exposing my entire backside...the smokers got to know me pretty well that day...Never wore that skirt again; with or without regular panties!
love to live; live to love.
Nothing worthless about this post,it's mad funny bruh!
LMBAO @ U!
Hillarious...We've all had those moments!
Things are really bad when you get
robbed after you've robbed a bank!-lolololol.
ROFLMBAO @ Bank robber who got stuck up and the guy who started off to work with no pants on.
Hillarious Post and definitely not worthless!
This post made my day...Nothing worthless about it Keith.
The "oops" moments remind us that we are human and subject to stupidity!
This was mad funny and cool Keith!
I try to limit my oops moments.
I have at least one of those moments everyday..but that's just me.
The guy left for his new job with no pants on? Can you imagine how he would have felt if he had gotten there like that? OMG,that would have been beond oops!-lololol
When a person says to another person-
"Hey I hear you're having a SURPISE
party"
That person ought to be smacked by everyone within hearing range!
A Bank Robber gets stuck up himself and he reports it to the police? That's just incredibly stupid...That's beyond an oops moment.
This post was a great little Monday
morning pick me up!
This was mad funny Keith!
How about reminiscent moments with the wife. How about talking with her about the great time you both had during you dating period. Oh yeah, sneaking out the windows and maybe meeting her at places no one ever knew about. Well, sometimes the memory fails us and "she" was not "that" person in that nice 5 star hotel in hideaway Heaven ....Opps & ouch! Of course we are talking pre-marriage.
@lol-Carey Carey-Ouu-I don't make mistakes like that! :)
ROFL! Keith, you know you were wrong for not telling Will! Whew, that's hilarious.
I have a whole archive of ooops...funny how I can't think of a specific one at the moment ;-).
lol...the robber was the most ignorant....
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