Friday, July 3, 2009

Weekend Joke

Why Parents Drink

A father passing by his son's bedroom was astonished to see that his bed was nicely made and everything was picked up. Then, he saw an envelope propped up prominently on the pillow that was addressed to "Dad". With the worst premonition, he opened the envelope with trembling hands and read the letter...

Dear Dad:

It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope with my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mom and you. I have been finding real passion with Stacy and she is so nice. But, I knew you would not approve of her because of all her piercings, tattoos, tight motorcycle clothes, and the fact that she is much older than I am. But it's not only the passion... Dad, she's pregnant.

Stacy said that we will be very happy. She owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. We share a dream of having many more children. Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone. We'll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the other people that live nearby for cocaine and ecstasy. In the meantime we will pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so Stacy can get better. She deserves it.

Don't worry, Dad. I'm 15 years old and I know how to take care of myself. Someday I'm sure that we will be back to visit so that you can get to know your grandchildren.

Love always,

Your son, John

P.S. Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at Tommy's house. I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than a report card that's in my center desk drawer. I love you. Call me when it's safe to come home.

20 comments:

Solomon said...

Keith, you had me on this one. I'm still trying to contain my laughter. That was funny.

A Free Spirit Butterfly said...

At first it seemed sad.... and then as usual, a twist! Too funny. The kid is right, it's only a report card (LOL)

Love, peace and blessings!
China

Sean said...

Hillarious!

James Perkins said...

Had me going for a minute,then I realized..this is your weekend humor post.

Jazzy said...

Took me for a loop on this one..Good one fam.

Simon Bastion said...

Too Funny!

Swaggie said...

You're all about the funny today..on both of your blogs!

Tate 2 said...

Twisted!...

Captain Jack said...

ROFLMGAO- That's just too funny..and wrong...lololol

Grover Tha Playboy said...

ROFLMAO-Happy Friday Keith!

Cheryl said...

Awwww that's not right!-lolololol.

Brenda said...

Good one Keith!

Lisa said...

That aint even right,jerking me around on two blogs in one morning
Keith-lololololol.

Halo said...

Happy Friday Keith,thanks for the laughs on both blogs this morning.

Vanessa said...

You're crazy-lololololol.

Angie B. said...

This was too funny!

Toni said...

I think we've all been in that situation with the report card as a
child! Hillarious twist!

Sunflower said...

Happy Friday Keith,Hope you and your family have a great 4th of July weekend!

Rich Fitzgerald said...

He still gets in trouble for the report card. Now, just not so much.

Rich Fitzgerald said...

Oh, have a happy 4th.




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