Monday, June 16, 2008

Role Models & Autographs

Here is another story from my past (I swear, I'm already working on my autobiography)... but, I'm writing this for a reason that has to do with now.

When I was 15, I was with a friend of mine and his dad... we were avid sports fans and we happened to run into a so called "Living Legend", at least as far as Philadelphia sports is concerned. I will not reveal his name because he is still alive and beloved here in this city. Besides, no one would believe me anyway if I did reveal his identity. My friend's dad went up to this guy and said, "I can't believe it's you. I named my son after you. Can we have your autograph?" The "Living Legend" said, "Man look, do you know how many guys have or will name their sons after me. Go away from me. I'm drunk. Can't you see I've been drinking. Get the hell away from me."

My friend's dad was visibly embarrassed. He looked at us and managed a weak smile but, he clearly felt like crap. Me and my boy were stunned. We watched this guy on television, followed his career, tried to walk and talk like him, and here he dismissed the three of us like we were nothing. On top of that, he was plastered. I never forgot it and it probably hardened my heart. I vowed never to ask another "famous" person for their autograph or anything.

Flash forward to 1983... I'm 25 years old and the 76ers have just won the NBA championship. The entire city is in a state of euphoria. I happened to be walking through this particular restaurant... a place that the city's athletes and movers 'n' shakers are known to frequent. I see a certain member of the Philadelphia 76ers who made it all happen. Once again, I won't reveal this person's name but, I will say this... he is sitting with another basketball player from the Houston Rockets who will himself win an NBA title a few years down the road. I forgot about what happened to my friend and his dad just 10 years before. I ran up to this guy and gushed like a school girl, telling him how great I thought he was and asking for his autograph. He told me, rather tersely, "Son, I don't do the autograph thang." I looked at him and didn't crack a smile. I simply said, "Cool" and walked away. That was in 1983... I have not asked another celebrity for anything since.
I have been in airports around the world and have personally seen the following celebrities: Charles Barkley, Allen Iverson, (both are really nice guys in person), Left Eye of TLC, (right before she died) Keith Sweat, Halle Berry, Terrence Howard, Jay-Z, Bill Clinton, The Roots, and John Legend. I have never asked any of them for their autographs. I've never approached them. I've merely acknowledged them from a distance.

I figure, I make my money (far less, of course) just like they make theirs. Anyway, what are you going to do with it once you have it? It's a name scribbled on a piece of paper. A great conversation piece, provided the person you are talking to believes you in the first place. Half the time, the writing is so illegible that you can't verify that it's the person you say it is anyway.

I don't stress myself out over celebrities anymore. I admit that I follow their careers, I keep stats on them if they are athletes, etc. but, I have never based how I live, how I carry myself as a man, and what I believe on somebody playing a kids game, running up and down the floor in short pants. I have never based my actions on someone who can sing well or play an instrument that I more than likely will never meet. My role models were my parents, grandparents, uncles, aunts, and maybe one or two teachers I had along the way. I could touch them, talk to them, and watch them up close.

So, you see, it is not the responsibility of an athlete, rapper, musician, actor or politician to provide a role model for children. Parents, teachers, preachers, and we... the individuals who finish school, go on to college, join the military, and work 9-5 jobs... will engage these kids and to show them how to be young men and young women. Charles Barkley said as much and he was right.

The only reason that the kids aren't listening to the everyday people in their lives and are learning from the rappers and actors per se is because somewhere along the line, we stopped engaging them. We became afraid of them. We stopped mentoring them because we were so busy on our own grind trying to make it. I fear we may have lost an entire generation because of it and have left them to be mentored by "celebrities." Let's try not to lose another generation.

(A heart-filled thank you to the "drunken but, beloved black athlete". You set me on the right path. Please have a drink on me and wherever you are today, I'm sure that's exactly what you're doing. This Bud's for you!)

4 comments:

OG, The Original Glamazon said...

Keith I so feel you on this, I have never asked anyone I didn’t know for their autograph. I have gotten things signed when I worked for the Rockets for family and friends. I had Clyde and Hakeem sign a finals program which I gave to my dad’s sister a DIE HARD Rockets fan. I had Clyde Drexler sign a Hot Pink Chili Pepper from the San Antonio all-star game. I still have that thing somewhere, one day I will display it with my other memorabilia I have from my time in sports, like my Game 6 NBA credentials that weren’t needed because we swept the Magic!

As you know my dad taught me a long time ago we all put our pants on one leg at a time. And that is how I view all those in celebrity having worked around athletes I know some of the perils with autograph signing that happen, since the invention of the sports memorabilia there really is no such thing as a innocent fan these days. Some of these dealers pay kids, old people, retarded kids whatever it takes to get some of the more elusive autographs.

I too have run across a few famous people Puffy, Beyonce, Scarface, Naughty by Nature, and the list of athletes I won’t even go into. And I like you just acknowledge them or might say I like your work. However I refuse to gush or think people should be like them or put that kind of added pressure on them. I gush more over a lady who was the first black woman trustee at my universe than I ever would over any athlete, entertainer, or politician. I keep my celebrity gushing private!! *lol*

Thanks for sharing the story I’m glad to know I’m not the only one out there who thinks that our kids should be looking up to the people in our community and we should be engaging with those people in the community.

I am so glad to know AI is good guy. I’ve been watching him since his freshman year at Georgetown. I almost went to that school just so I could be next to him and Mourning…I know sad …but I was 17 at the time what’s that crude saying young, dumb, and full of thoughts of being a world leader. Yeah that’s it!

Good Post!!

-OG

ZACK said...

At first, I thought that it was Dr. J. But he wasn't playing for the 76ers in 1973. Fred Carter is my guess because I just googled the 1973 roster of the 76ers, and Fred "Mad Dog" Carter was the only Philly native on the team. Then, I looked at his bio on wikipedia, and he WAS an ESPN commentator.

So, Fred is my best answer.

But I am definitely not star struck. Celebrities will not remember you if you see them again, so there's no point in meeting them. The best you can do is smile and wave, and hope they wave back.

Great post! But if you ever come to Chicago- you better give me your autograph. Only after I get O.G.'s autograph. Ladies first.

Mizrepresent said...

Man, i can't tell you how many "so called" celebrities i have ran into, met, and have had dealings with, but i must say, i was never no "Groupie". I always told myself, i can be twice as much as you, and so i don't bend down or break my spirit to behold a man/woman who has been upheld in the public eye. It is a sad case, kids look up to these joints, and sadly they have bitten into their own hype. In the end, we are human, in the end, we must answer to our acts, and live our life as such. If they are evil, non-respondent, disrepectful, their lives will truly be of such. It's probably a good thing you were able to reach this conclusion at a young age, there are so many others that are still following the fame, but knowing nothing of the man/woman.

Shanita Waters said...

Insighful post. You absolutely right. I am in complete agreement with you regarding the youth. It is our responsibility to mentor them.

However, when I look at how the celeberties responded to autograph requests I have to conclude that they were just plain old rude. If God ever permits me to become a Times Best Seller or a celebrity by some other means, I would never refuse to give a fan an autograph. Without the fans it's impossible to be a celebirty. When people spend their hard earned money supporting you, the least you can do is appease them by giving them an autograph. It takes seconds. Celeberties need to remember where they came from when they looked up to someone and were influenced by them.

On the same note, we should instill in our youth that they should not idolize these talented men and women so that if (and most likely when) they do something that adversely affects their reputation, the children won't want to follow suit or be crushed when they are let down.




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