Tuesday, July 8, 2008

Down Low, Dirty Shame


I was listening to Amy Winehouse's current CD and blog surfing a few weeks ago. (It was one of the few times when I was actually in the house by myself.) I felt my cell phone vibrate and wondered, who could this be? I looked at my screen, smiled, and thought... wow, another country heard from. I hadn't talked to this person in years... not since we stopped working at the same place. I'll call her N. It turned out that N. was calling to tell me that it was the first anniversary of her marriage. Marriage? First Anniversary? I wasn't aware she had gotten married. I remember that she was engaged to a guy, I'll call him Crawford (for want of a better name), for three of the total seven years that they were together.

Did you ever meet somebody that you just know must have something wrong with them because they seem too perfect? Well, that was Crawford. First, Crawford was about seven years N.'s junior yet, he had what you ladies call "swagger"... he had swagger goin' to bed. He carried himself like he was older, which is why N. was so enamored with him. He even appeared to be somewhat flirtatious with the other ladies in the office. N. would often complain that Crawford would vanish for days at a time. She'd try his cell phone and it was off... send him a text and it wouldn't be returned. Now, conventional wisdom told me that he was seeing another woman but, I knew better than to say that around N.

Well, N. and Crawford eventually got engaged and all of that came to an end. A year passed, another year passed, and another year passed. Finally, I asked N., "When are you two getting married?" She said, "I don't know. I keep asking Crawford and he keeps beating around the bush." Again, I thought... another woman... a jump off. Well, I couldn't have been more wrong.

Crawford took N. out to dinner about three nights later and said that he was ready to get married. N. was relieved and told everyone at work that a date was set. Then, Crawford dropped the bomb. (You know where this is headed don't you?) Crawford informed her that, although he intended to marry her, she must understand that... "I occasionally prefer the company of a young man." N. told me that she thought, "something in nature had failed... like the sun had fallen out of the sky." This explained Crawford's disappearances. He insisted, however, that he was not gay. After all, he had been sleeping with N. for seven years. He said that he just liked to "experiment with young men from time to time." Da Nile is more than just a river in Egypt!

Needless to say, N. dropped Crawford like a bad habit and now, two years after that, she's telling me she's been married for a year! I asked, "It's not Crawford is it?" She said no and that she wanted all of us to meet him. So, we all dropped by our hangout after work at the end of the week to see just WHO was the mystery man. He was no Crawford... but, like Crawford, he was a few years younger than N. He wore a baseball cap, a baseball jersey, and a nice pair of jeans. He seemed like a nice guy, had a pretty good job, and held his own with the guys. He was also more respectful of her than Crawford had been... no flirting with her girlfriends behind her back. (Kinda made me wonder if all of that had been an act.)

N. seems very, very happy now that she's finally married and I wish her the best. As for Crawford? I've seen him in town a few times and he has another girlfriend. I wonder if she knows about his secret life? I wonder if even Crawford understands his secret life?

"I told you... that I was trouble... ya know, that I'm no good." - Amy Winehouse

2 comments:

Dreamy said...

wow, wow, wow. man that is so messed up, but you know I say a person always see's the sign that something is not right with their partner. sometimes we choose to ignore the signs is all.

i happy that she dropped that fool. and i hope that he comes to terms with himself.

Mizrepresent said...

Wow, what a mess...OMG! I'm gonna need to start asking folks, what's their preference for real!




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